Things my mother taught me.

I posted this on the discussion board for my Sociology class a little while ago. The topic was about how we socialize our children by gender. It turned out to be more emotional than I expected:

I grew up in a Matriarchal household (picture Roseanne). My mother was clearly in charge and even my father answered to her. This probably had a lot to do with the fact that she had to be a single parent in a time where that was generally not acceptable for women.


As a child I was not given only boy or only girl things. My clothes were all kinds of colors. I had all kinds of toys. I remember when I was five I would spend a lot of time playing with this Superman action figure I had. I used to tie a towel around my neck and pretend I could fly. I had dolls I really liked I played house with other kids. I owned a bunch of matchbox cars. My toys were chosen by the fact that they were cheap and not because they were for a specific gender. I loved wrestling and My Little Ponies. I adored video games and running around getting dirty.

Mostly I was taught constantly that girls are just as good as boys and can do all the same things boys can do. I was told to never let anyone tell me I couldn't do something because I was a girl. I was taught to be a strong woman because my mother thought I should be prepared to survive on my own without a man. According to my mother, you had to be able to do it all and be strong.

Now I have interests in science and math, and I still play video games. I also like arts and crafts and dancing. I wear make-up and I consider myself to be a tough broad. I have my mother to thank for that. I thought with all this talk about how we gender identify our children from an early age it would be nice to present my life as an example of what could happen if we didn't.

On a personal note my mother died when I was 20. We didn't often agree, and this is the first time in a long time I teared up thinking about her. I had forgotten how much she really had to do with the woman I became.